Jetlag Is A Bitch

I woke up yesterday morning at two in the morning and that was it. Ding. Wide awake. Managed to function through the day till eight o'clock and then out like a light on the couch again. This morning was a little better. Woke at four. The three of us were sitting round the living room watching cartoons by half past. What doesn't help is having "The Rainbow Connection" stuck in my head on an endless loop.



This is quite possibly the greatest song ever recorded by man or frog, but it just won't leave me alone. It's been in my head on a constant loop since we got off the plane.

I hate jetlag.

The Harbour Bridge in Auckland. Good snap given we were travelling at speed.

The reason I haven't posted since we arrived back in Auckland (and Ireland since) is that I just couldn't be arsed. Plus we took a more personal turn in our trip and spent quite a bit of time catching up with friends of Cathy's, wherein one case we discovered that New Zealand also likes daft internet memes. Witness...



Which led to...



And so on.

While Caleb stayed with his family, myself and Cathy stayed in a motel down the road, the Cascades. It didn't appear on google maps or anywhere on google when we were researching the place and so instantly sent me into terror at the prospect of a rat-infested hellhole of Dickensian squalor. It was actually grand. From our base there we spent the week doing fun stuff. We went to the famous Rainbow's End theme park, which, because the tourist season is almost over, was like having our own personal mini-golf, go-kart, water bumpers funspot.

This is what it felt like in the Getz. Actually all this talk of bumpers segues nicely into...

One of the downsides of approaching middle age is the terror that the future begins to hold. Needless to say, insurance companies love that shit. It makes the likes of me buy insurance on the car and travel insurance and probably insurance for the insurance. Which is grand because after we were rear ended (not our fault) we'd replaced the car within an hour and were back on the road to catch up with more people in Genghis Khans All You Can Eat Giant Shed (not really called that, but it was a giant shed and it was called Genghis Khans). So I suppose to say the week was uneventful would be wrong. We even got to go to the IMAX cinema. Twice. This part of the holiday can not be underestimated. I don't care that the movies we saw were Mission Impossible 45 and John "What the Hell is Going On?" Carter. It was IMAX. It was awesome.

The night before we left we decided to bookend our visit to New Zealand with a trip to Orbit, the swanky rotating restaurant on top of the Sky Tower. Reviewing the food (which was quite good) is pointless because the restaurant is slowly turning over the space of an hour, giving you an excellent view of the city.

After tearful farewells and 36 hours of bloody planes, we got back home and since then I've been chewing over the trip as a whole when I can stay conscious. So here are my impressions of New Zealand.

New Zealand is very like Ireland and England. The north is like Ireland in the summer, and the south is like Ireland in the winter. There are lots of very nice people there. For instance, the guy that crashed into us was the kind of fellow you'd happily go for a pint with.

New Zealand is very beautiful. Scale Ireland up about four times and give it the odd gigantic forest and a glacier or two and you're there.

Earthquakes are frightening in their capacity to psychologically scar people. The physical wreckage you can see on the news, but it's only in dealing with people on a day to day basis that you get the impression of the impact that these disasters can have on people hundreds of miles away from the flattened houses and shattered streets.

New Zealand is very lucky to have the Maori culture to root it as it's own nation, because quite often it feels as if the media and politicians refer to the stylings of England and Europe in their inspirations and policies.

Speights is the best beer I have ever drank. Ever. Both it's "Pride of The South" and "Distinction" labels are sublime. I'm glad we can't get it over here, because I'd have a bottle in my hand from one end of the day to the other. It really is that good.

The Samsung Galaxy S2 is quite possibly the greatest device ever. GPS, email, Facebook, Blogging, finding accommodation, banking, watching Mad Men season one on lazy mornings, lighting up dark corners of cars late at night to find the lost gold. The phone made our lives infinitely easier on our trip and I really had to give it credit, even if it is an inanimate object.


That's it. A fine holiday/trip to the other side of the world. I don't know if I'd be in a huge rush back for purposes of exotic culture and peoples exposure, but I can certainly see why the Irish people forced to emigrate find their way there. And not to insult same, but I'm glad to be home.

Thanks for reading.










The new Muppet movie is well worth watching by the way.

Back To Auckland

We got back from Dunedin to Auckland yesterday and to the entire purpose of our trip. Caleb's dad was at Terry's place along with the rest of the family and needless to say, the kid was over the moon to see his da, especially after me busting his chops the last fortnight I expect. So as myself and Cathy left the house without child, the dreadful feeling of absence when you lose a member of the team descended, giving us time to contemplate and review before figuring out what to actually do with ourselves.

Dunedin was a great old town in the end. The comparisons between it and Edinburgh and indeed, Cork (big college towns, same population, hilly, good pubs, iffy weather) left me with the same vaguely disturbing feeling that we couldn't possibly be on the other side of the world because the whole trip feels like a trip over to England or Northern Ireland or something. It's bizarre. One significant difference however is that we haven't had any major earthquakes destroy the major city in our region.

The butterfly exhibition in Otago museum in Dunedin.

The destruction of Christchurch hangs over everything in the South. We visited the Speights brewery and found out they lost a third of their entire company that day. The museums and larger public meeting places have screens rolling video of people trying to restore their lives. We met friends of Cathys that simply couldn't bring themselves to go back there, retirees in their eighties moving away, and heard stories of people praying their houses would be condemneded so they could get some money and move away to another more stable part of the country. And that's the underlying reality I'm afraid. People are just getting out and the city is dying. Already a third of the population have left, and though there are plenty of diehards holding onto and rebuilding their town, it will never again be the city it once was. Tragic.

The Speights brewery. I bought the t-shirt.

Fifty grands worth of mirror. It's about right feet wide. Don't make them like they used to.

Baldwin Street. Apparently the steepest in the southern hemisphere. I invoke Patrick's Hill as a challenger to the world record.

This picture refuses to load in landscape. Anyway, I had nothing to do with this. I just ended up with seriously good (cold) pizza and a crate of beer in the back of the car by way of gift and accident. It is a nice place here.


As usual, time was way too short in Dunedin, but we did get to a few touristy things. The Otago museum was excellent, couldn't understand our guide in the brewery which was fine cos there were samples, Cadburys factory was a bit shit really but the main highlights were the people. Caleb's great gran, Calebs grandfather, old neighbours and friends of Cathys. All excellent folk. After a few days we really did feel at home and leaving was a bit of a wrench, but tin can 1 had to be deposited at the airport so we could get new blue tin can 2 for our last week in Auckland. Myself and Cathy did fine without the boy in the end. Had a nice dinner, couple of pints and watched the new Mission Impossible at the local IMAX, which is a truly awesome cinema experience and made me very happy.

Pit stop

I'm going to let the snaps do the talking for the last few days.

Approaching the Franz Josef glacier on our way from Greymouth. The blueness of the water is the real deal. Pure glacier water.

Franz Josef. Alpine town. Does a big trade in skiing aswell as summer hiking, helicopter tours etc.

Franz Joseph Glacier

Puzzle World in Wanaka. Caleb's favourite bit so far.

Kinda sums up the cheeky humour of the place

You close an eye and the faces follow you and yadda yadda. I reckon it's an interesting pic.

The maze. First half hour was fun. And then it got stressful.

We've been in Dunedin about a day now. It's a college town on the south eastern coast that's like the Scottish outpost in New Zealand. The main square in the town, the Octagon, features a statue of the great Robbie Burns, and the city is named similarly to Edinburgh.

It's a fair bit cooler down here and an extra layer will be required for the next few days. Bit like home actually. We're staying with Thelma, Calebs great-grandmother, who is in her early eighties but has energy and an interest in the world around her that is inspiring. We finished a lovely dinner last night, sat down to watch Frozen Planet and then had a long discussion on the crisis in the Euro,dodgy NZ investment firms (where the thieving scumbags at least end up in court) and the tent at the Galway races.

Things are slowing down a bit now and it's going to be catching up with family for the next couple of days. That's okay though. The mad dash is done and we can concentrate on not concentrating until Saturday morning, when we have to fly back to Auckland for the last week.

Can't believe we've been in New Zealand a week and a half.